Friday

Just sent JJ boy my precious to the vet for his sterilisation (11 years overdue might I add), turns out he has one undescended testicle (maybe that’s why he never humped anything or taken an interest in females 🤔). Also doing some dental works – gotta clean his teeth, he never let us brush it 🙄.

Worried sick though the vet was very reassuring and he’s now waiting alone in the clinic in a little cage 😔. I feel so guilty argh.

I pray that everything will go smoothly, vet will find the undescended testicle quickly and close him up.

Gahhh. This waiting game. 😖

This is him giving me the “where are you bringing me to hooman” face.

I love you JJ, I’ll be there later to bring you back with your favourite food! You brave boy you!

Advertisements

Having a panic attack right now.. literal one not a figurative one.

Started sobbing uncontrollably because of everything – i miss home, miss my parents, can’t breathe, can’t sleep, can’t sit properly, can’t enjoy my food, bed is too hard, pillow is too soft, basically everything.

Texting my mum just made it worse because it made me miss home even more and didn’t help that I could hear my dad in the background telling me not to cry.

I can’t breathe, literally. Bean’s pushing up my rib cage or lungs or something. I feel like someone’s sitting on my chest, my lungs are not working.

Sleep is difficult now, constantly trying to find a comfortable position. Not just sleeping even sitting down on a couch is difficult because it’s so uncomfortable – again, cannot breathe.

Sorry Bean, mummy’s not blaming you ok? I blame the hormones. You’ve been a good baby so far ❤️ even letting me go to Athens!

Can’t tell J because he’ll just be overly worried and I don’t want him to feel like I’m a burden. 😞

We’re just gonna have to push through these last 12 weeks (or less) together Bean! Fighting! 💪🏻

Updates

Am sweating buckets every day every hour omg why is it so warm?!

I’ve actually resorted to using a towel to soak up my sweat! What the..

Also I’m enjoying eating alone more and more these days. Well technically I’m not “alone” since Bean’s with me 😂 though not voluntarily.

Had my 28 week appointment yesterday and yay no more low lying placenta (it has moved up!), Bean’s doing well and I’ve managed to maintain my weight since my last appointment.

I need to get my ass moving on buying those things in my cart… and pay shipping for that crib!

Ok no time like now.

27 weeks

So I’ve not been posting the last 16 weeks lol that’s 4 months oops.

Some updates and recaps:

Morning sickness is gone, thankfully.

Doctor gave the OK for half boiled eggs (yay), sashimi (only in reputable SG restaurants and no tuna/swordfish), manicures/pedicures even tea/coffee (i limit myself to one a day).

I’ve put on 5kgs in my second trimester so far holy crap and I’m at my heaviest (in ma life) right now. And still going. Wtf.

We found out the gender, it’s a girl! My little princess 💗.

Placenta’s a little low and I was told not to walk or climb staircases too much. But I think i climbed a ton of staircases in Greece especially in Santorini. Oops. I hope everything will be ok 😖 during my next check up.

She’s kicking a lot these days and J actually (finally) felt her punch (or kick, not sure) the other day in Greece.

We’re totally freaking out, i mean big time.

I’m worried about this 3rd party who’s coming between us LOL dynamics will definitely change. If we’ll be good parents, if we can bring her up to be a respectable person, etc.

J’s worried about her future boyfriends 🙄.

Most of my clothes don’t fit anymore, all of my pants basically. Thankfully I’ve always worn loose fitting dresses so I didn’t really have to buy a lot of maternity wear. Just a couple of maternity shorts from taobao and one from H&M.

12 more weeks to go – shit’s about to get real guys.

It’s week 11.

The nausea has kinda erm decreased.. I won’t say stopped in case it comes back. Heh.

Rice now tastes less sweet, which is good cos Asians.

Ya Kun’s half-ish boiled eggs didn’t taste as good as I imagined it to be, unfortunately.

I’m trying to cut down on carbs so I’ve been eating steaks these past few days.

Oh literally threw up on Tuesday, after eating popiah with too much garlic and now I’m traumatised by garlic and the thought of it.

Which sucks, cos it means sakae teppanyaki is out of the question since it’s LOADED with garlic. ermergerd

Chinese soups are good though, so far lotus root and old cucumber soups have been acceptable.

Lobster bisque has lost its appeal, sadly.

Am still constantly worrying that something will go wrong and it’s driving me nuts.

Kept telling baby to be strong!

And idk why but I’m getting a lot of “are you pregnant?”, “maybe you’re pregnant” questions which makes me even more anxious because it’s not yet 3 mths!!!!

Evening sickness is probably more accurate to describe my condition right now. I realise that my nausea and gastric problems are more intense in the evening than in the day.

The fatigue is still there, mainly cos of waking up in the middle of the night usually 2.30-3am to pee.

There’s still a weird taste in my mouth and rice/bread/pasta taste too sweet. It’s like i know they’re sugar but i can literally taste the sweetness now.

Next appointment is on 31/1 and we’re gonna be doing some blood tests and hopefully everything’s fine!

Just be healthy bb!

Omg the hormones emo nemo shit is real.

Just got really upset and started crying because I can’t eat anything like no appetite and all plus heartburn and all that nonsense.

I know it’ll all be worth it but man I’m upset.

Baby I’m not blaming you but i just can’t wait to eat properly again!!

J’s horrified by my sudden emo-ness but he’s the only one i can talk to now…